Lead Me Not, by Ann Gallagher
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Lead Me Not, by Ann Gallagher
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Isaac Morris has devoted his life to preaching against the sin of homosexuality. But when his sister proposes a documentary to demonstrate once and for all that it’s a choice—with Isaac choosing to be gay as proof—he balks. Until he learns his nephew is headed down that perverted path. Isaac will do anything to convince the teenager he can choose to be straight . . . including his sister’s film.
When Isaac’s first foray into the gay lifestyle ends with a homophobic beating, he’s saved and cared for by Colton Roberts, a gentle, compassionate bartender with a cross around his neck. Colton challenges every one of Isaac’s deeply held beliefs about gay men. He was kicked out by homophobic parents, saved from the streets by a kind pastor, and is now a devout Christian. Colton’s sexuality has cost him dearly, but it also brought him to God.
As the two grow closer, everything Isaac knows about homosexuality, his faith, and himself is called into question. And if he’s been wrong all along, what does that mean for his ministry, his soul, his struggling nephew—and the man he never meant to love?
Lead Me Not, by Ann Gallagher- Amazon Sales Rank: #3065112 in Books
- Published on: 2015-03-02
- Original language: English
- Number of items: 1
- Dimensions: 8.00" h x .87" w x 5.25" l, .87 pounds
- Binding: Paperback
- 348 pages
About the Author Director, the International Centre for Nursing Ethics
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Most helpful customer reviews
7 of 7 people found the following review helpful. A very important work. Should be required reading in all High Schools By Carlos T. Mock Lead Me Not by Ann GallagherIsaac Morris is a pastor - and the son of a very conservative preacher - at the Summer Bluff Christian Church in Washington State. After protesting at the summer Bluff Pride Parade, a gay man challenges Isaac to try to become gay - since Isaac believes that being gay is a choice.Initially Isaac shrugs the idea, but his twin sister, Ruth, convinces him to "create" a documentary where she will record Isaac's transition to the "gay lifestyle" and then back to being straight. Originally, Isaac is not willing; first because he's had gay tendencies himself, and second because he can't reconcile that lifestyle with his religious beliefs. But John, one of his older brothers, pushes him to do the project because John's son, Griffin, is struggling with homosexuality. John reasons that if Isaac can convert in and out of homosexuality it will be an example for Griffin and all the teens who are struggling with homosexual tendencies. Reluctantly Isaac and his family agree to do the project.Ruth and Isaac move to Seattle where Isaac tries to blend with the gay culture and on his first encounter he's beaten quite badly in the back alley of the gay club Capitol OUT by a bunch of straight men. Isaac is saved by Colton Roberts and the Capitol OUT bouncers.Colton Roberts has had a miserable existence. Kicked out of his home when he came out to his parents at age 14, he had pimped himself to be able to survive. Ravaged by alcoholism and lack of self esteem, Colton is saved by Pastor Mike, pastor of the South Street Community Church, and his wife, Gail. Colton is now a bartender at the Capital OUT gay bar in Seattle and volunteers at Pastor's Mike's church where he helps run a shelter for homeless LGBT kids.After being released from the hospital, Colton takes Isaac under his wing - teaching him how to survive in the scene, and most importantly, finding a job as a bartender at Capitol OUT. They become friends - and soon thereafter they have feelings for each other. Isaac is introduced to Pastor Mike's ministry, where everyone is welcomed and loved without reservations. Isaac argues with the Pastor that being gay is an abomination. They go over the "passages" that Isaac's father uses to condemn homosexuals. For the first time Isaac realizes that there is much more about being gay and that his church could be very wrong on their interpretation of the scriptures because it ends up condemning children to be rejected by their families and treated with violence as a result - as his brother John is planning to do to Griffin if he can't be "cured" of his homosexuality.Colton has not have a meaningful relationship with any man, because every time he does, he gets seriously hurt. Slowly, he warms up to Isaac. First is the physical attraction - Isaac is a very handsome 27 y/o man - but later is the tenderness. Soon they form a very strong bond. They fall in love.Isaac realizes he's gay and in love with Colton.Unfortunately, Isaac's brothers have been keeping tabs on the project and right after Isaac reaches out to his nephew to let him know that Isaac will always be there for him (John was planning to send Griffin to a conversion therapy camp) - Isaac's two older brothers break into Capitol OUT and expose Isaac in front of Colton and all their gay friends. Colton is, once again, severely hurt for opening up.Isaac and Ruth leave Seattle. They decide to make the documentary, but instead of condemning homosexuality, they decide that the love Isaac has for Colton trumps all the teachings their family stood for. After the documentary airs nationally, Colton and Isaac make up and live happily ever after...This wonderful sappy work is narrated from the third person point of view of both our protagonists: Isaac and Colton. Since both men are dealing with their demons there is no other better way to express their love story than to see it from their respective points of view.Themes like parental rejection are very well presented. Colton would go to his parents' tomb to ask for forgiveness for being gay - even though it's quite clear that it was the parents who failed the son: "The thing is, our parents are the core of our worlds from the time we're children. Given the opportunity, for better or worse, children - even as adults - will forgive their parents faster and more often than they will anyone except their own children" (Isaac tells Colton as he counsels Colton that what he really need to do is forgive himself.)On coming out: "The night I came out, all I wanted was for my family to know I'd figured out who I was. I didn't expect everything to change. I didn't set out to be defined by it. But I am. Everything in my life for the last twelve years is defined by being gay." (Colton tells Isaac why he came out.)Low self esteem: "The thing is, after my own parents turned me away, I was sure no one would ever love me again. I didn't know if they'd ever loved me." (Colton tells Isaac why he has such a hard forming a relationship.)On whether homosexuality is a choice: "Tonight felt...bigger than it should have been. Like it was something inevitable that we've been moving toward for...for I don't know how long. Like God was moving us toward tonight, and when tonight happened, it wasn't something I could chose or deny. It just...it just was." (Isaac tells Colton on the first night they spend together.)Pastor Mike and Isaac hold a long discussion (Chapter 17) as to the validity of the Bible and as to whether it actually condemns homosexuals, transgenders, and masturbation. Personally, I give the Bible as much validity as I give any other fairy tale, but for the sake of the work at hand, according to Pastor Mike: transgenders are afflicted by a sin that "manifests as a mind whose gender is mismatched to its body," The story of Onan, which is used to condemn masturbation, "when Onan was condemned for 'spilling his seed upon the ground' it wasn't because he'd masturbated...he was for being disobedient to the Lord and for refusing to honor his dead brother" giving his widowed sister in law an heir, as the law required. Sodom and Gomorra were destroyed for being inhospitable and for raping their guests. Leviticus: if you obeyed every rule in Leviticus, you could not wear a polyester blend, shave, or eat seafood. Eagles and storks would be abominations also. And finally the tale of the Centurion and his slave where Jesus cured the slave because the Centurion was in "love" with him - a very controversial passage that some people interpret as Jesus condoning homosexuality.I believe Ms. Gallagher has created a very important work and should be required reading for all high schools. Not only it's wonderful read - I did shed some tears and could barely put the book down - but also, I believe it would make the world a better place.
8 of 9 people found the following review helpful. This is one of my top reads for 2015 By DiDi GPBR How do I write a review for a book that moved me so much, that made me think, that made me hope it makes other people think, that gets the fact that just because someone is gay, bi, or transgender that they can also be spiritual, that respects the rights of all and that tries to make others see that in preaching hate they are driving children, teens, and young men and women into hurting themselves or putting themselves in danger? Seriously someone, tell me how I do that? I feel so much about this book, Lead Me Not by Ann Gallagher (aka L.A. Witt, aka Lauren Gallagher) that I want it required reading for anyone who works with children, any parent who has a gay or transgender child, any religious leader, and our politicians that want to condemn what they have no clue about. This is one of those books I won't ever forget; it is a 5 star read times ten, it is passionate, it is beautiful, and it is about two men who when their paths cross they are changed forever.I'll be honest and say I've never understood "fire and brimstone" preaching, I experienced it late in life and understood immediately why my husband wanted nothing to do with the church he grew up in and why he was so shocked to attend a church where the message was about good and not evil. So what happens when someone has grown up in one of these churches, where his father is the pastor, where all he's heard all his life is that homosexuality is a sin, when he's had temptations but has turned away from them and when he begins to question those teachings, not his faith, never his faith but the "word" his father has preached? Lead Me Not is that story and it is an amazing journey of self discovery, faith, and love.Isaac Morris has spent his life learning the teachings of his father's church and becoming a preacher to spread the word against the sin of homosexuality. When a man at a rally challenges him to prove being gay is a choice he's unsure how to show that until his sister comes up with a plan; one that will put him living the gay lifestyle and leave him questioning everything.Being kicked out of his home for being gay and living on the streets doing whatever necessary to survive Colton Roberts has had a hard life and doesn't trust many people. When he helps a patron of the bar he works in after an attack he feels something he hasn't in a long time, something that gives him hope but also scares him. Taking a chance with a man barely out of the closet is a risk but one he's pretty sure he wants to take.Two very different men, two very different lives, but two men who believe in God, church and the bible just different interpretations of it made this one hell of a story. I can't even begin to explain the complexity and the feelings this book brought forth so I'm not going to try. At the beginning of this book there was no doubt these men did not see eye to eye on what the Bible says and while they both had secrets, Isaac 's secret was something that he couldn't share for fear of ruining what he was trying to accomplish even knowing that in the end Colton would be hurt. While my rational brain understood this, I had issues with the fact that this good Christian man was lying and could potentially devastate another human being. One would think that without a lot of sexy times this book moved at a slow pace but it did not, I was surprised by how quickly I worked through it and that was largely because I couldn't wait to see how everything played out. I enjoyed watching the friendship between Isaac and Colton blossom, watching their trust build (even though I knew it was going to come crashing down) and watching Isaac struggle with his growing feelings towards Colton and figuring out that the impulses he's had all of his life that he pushed down were no longer something he wanted to deny. I hurt for both of these men on several occasions throughout this book; it was tough watching them struggle, to cope and to accept, but through it all there was also this message of goodness, light and hope.If you've never read a gay romance, if you are worried about the religious aspect of this book, if you think you can't like it because there is no sex I urge you to try this book. The message in this book is one of love and understanding, it is not "preachy" at all and if this book helps one person realize how harmful hate preaching can be, then it has done its job but it is my hope that it shows many people the light. I'm not an overly religious person and I was concerned about reading this inspirational romance, but because I've always admired this author's work and she asked me to give it a try, I did and I could not be happier that I listened. This is one of my top reads for 2015 and as I'm writing this review I have read 279 books so far in 2015 so that tells you how much I loved this book, so much so that I feel I can't even adequately express my thoughts. So, I'll just say read this book, let the story envelope you, let the message seep into your soul and then remember it when you come across someone who claims to be a Christian but all they want to do is preach their intolerance for people not like them. Well done Ann Gallagher, you have once again floored me and left me tongue tied.Review copy provided for an honest review.
1 of 1 people found the following review helpful. A fantastic quiet M/M romance By V. Rundell of V's Reads This is a book about coming to terms with sexuality and features a Christian youth minister attempting to "choose" to be gay, in order to PROVE that homosexuality is a choice to turn from. Intellectually, it was a fascinating premise, and the execution of the story was exceptional.Isaac is the youngest child of a fundamentalist Christian minister whose teachings are undeniably homophobic. His twin, Ruth, convinces Issac--and their conservative family--that Issac should try to be gay and then return to heterosexuality, in order to prove that there exists a "choice." Isaac is unsure of the wisdom of this path--he's suffered impure thoughts of men his whole life, and his faith is also shaken by his recent divorce from his high school sweetheart. However, his brother John's eldest son, Griffin, is showing definite inclinations down this sin-laden path and Isaac wants desperately to can help guide Griffin back to the straight and holy. Still, this premise is dubiously accepted by ttheir father and his congregation. Ruth and Isaac move to Seattle, to immerse Isaac in the "gay scene" which Ruth documents with video. Unfortunately, it's not exactly what Isaac's father's preachings have professed. First, Isaac doesn't witness the outright debauchery he expected. Second, while trying to find a suitable partner in the bar scene, Isaac is beat up by homophobic bigots, and the man who saves him is Colton, a shy and compassionate gay man.Colton is a former homeless child prostitute who's had the roughest of lives since he came out in his early teens and his parents kicked him out. He's suffered alcohol and drug addiction, exposure and depression, and come out the other side. He's still tormented by the loss of his family, and works hard at Capital OUT (a gay bar) and the South Street Community Church, a gay-friendly church and homeless shelter for LGBT youth, sheparded by Pastor Mike, Colton's surrogate father.Isaac is blown away that a gay person is a church-goer, and he's sure that the heresy taught there is as big an abomination as homosexuality itself, but time and contact with Colton begin to soften Isaac's feelings. Isaac takes Colton up on a job at Capital OUT--all in the guise of research--and is astounded by the normality and loving nature of the gay scene. As well as by Colton's tenderness. (Expect some cameos from characters in other LA Witt/Gallagher books!) In the process of this experiment Isaac does some serious soul-searching, aided by Ruth, his ex-wife, and an estranged sister. I was really touched by the depths to which Isaac dug to understand his sexuality, and also to recognize that his opinions were slowly morphing as he gained new and valuable perspective.In truth, I felt like this book had so much resonance. Having grown up in a Christian fundamentalist church I was exposed to lots of conservative ideals--similar to Isaac's upbringing. I got out before things became too contentious, but I could really identify with Isaac, and his big decisions. His torment over his soul, and Griffin's prospects in their decidedly homophobic family, weigh heavily upon him.Meanwhile, Colton and Isaac are falling for each other. This is a cautious and quiet exploration. Isaac is essentially a shy virgin, and Colton suffers PTSD from the rapes and horrors he suffered as a rentboy. The emotional context of this story was so ripe and engaging. Do not expect a lot of steam, this book is all about the heart and the feels.Naturally, Isaac's mission comes to light, and in the worst way possible. The resolution was outstanding, however, and the epilogue literally brought tears to my eyes. Really, I adored this book. The religious bits were so well done, and Isaac and Colton were not mere shells--they were whole, rendered persons that I cheered for throughout.I received a review copy of this book via NetGalley.
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